Go Girls Fight Club

The first rule of Go Girls Fight Club is....no one talks about Go Girls Fight Club.

That's probably why you haven't heard of it before.

Oh dear. It seems that we are no longer Good Society.

Beat the Heat!

Baby, it's hot outside. It's smokin'. We are in the midst of a hot, humid summer here in TO. It's hard to believe that seven months ago, we battled wind-chill temperatures of -28C. Now we're up against temperatures of 40C or higher, with the humidity, which begs the question: "Do Canadians ever just measure the temperature without the wind chill or humidity factor?" [Answer: Not in Ontario!]

So how do you beat the heat on the run? The Go Girls want to ensure that you have a good summer of running and so we (okay, I) have decided to share some tips with you about how to keep cool while looking cool while out on the run. Run on, reader-runners, for my best tips.

Tip 1: Dress for the weather

It is important to consider the heat and humidity when it is very hot and when it is very cold, and all temperatures in between. When it is hot, wear shorts and a T-shirt or a singlet (but only if you have good biceps and triceps), plus socks. Maybe shoes, too. Remember to wear technical gear and avoid cotton. Cotton retains moisture and will become much heavier as you progress in your run. Cotton is Rotten!

Here is an example of what you should not wear:

That's me (T) on the left. Note that I am wearing a helmet. Helmets are really good for the ski hill, but probably not necessary for most runs.

Here is an example of what you could wear:

You should disregard what Nana, the lady in the middle, is wearing. Nana is from the South and therefore is almost always comfortable in very hot weather. Note that the two Canadian (me on the left and Olga on the right) are dressed appropriately for summer. Also note that Olga has the biceps and triceps to merit wearing a sleeveless shirt. I am not wearing a sleeveless shirt. Draw your own conclusions.

Tip 2: Drink lots...but not alcohol

You should remember to drink lots of water before, during, and after your run. If you will be out longer than one hour, you should bring along a sports drink to help you replace electrolytes lost through sweat. Note: notwithstanding what hockey players may tell you, beer is not considered a sports drink, even if you do drink Yankee Jim beer in the changeroom before and after games. Am I right, Stars?

Here I am drinking coconut milk directly from the coconut. Wow! Was that coconut milk ever disgusting! Nevertheless people who like coconut milk may find drinking coconut milk on a run helpful. But good luck finding a guy selling real coconuts down on the Martin Goodman Trail!

Tip 3: Run in the morning or evening

Try to log your runs in the coolest part of the day: the morning. You may not enjoy getting up early, but you will be grateful you got out on the roads early as the temperatures soar during the day. If you miss the opportunity to run first thing in the morning, log your run in the evening. Avoid running in the middle of the day and into the afternoon.

Really, this tip is a no brainer. If you are looking for tips on how to beat the heat and you also run in the middle of the day, you need more help that we can offer.

Tip 4: Run by large bodies of water

Sometimes I forget that Toronto is located on Lake Ontario. But if you go as far south as you can in Toronto, you will hit a lake. It is hidden behind the Gardiner Expressway and a lot of new condo buildings. I do not recommend swimming in this lake, but I highly recommend running along the Martin Goodman Trail, which follows the lake shore. It is generally a bit cooler by the lake. I know there is a scientific explanation for why it is cooler by the lake but gosh darn it, Jim, I'm a runner not a doctor...uh, scientist! Basically, I don't know why, I just now that it is cooler by the lake.

These runners have the right idea: run in the evening by a nice, large body of water...on a beautiful Caribbean Island.

If you cannot make it to the lake, find a large puddle. Various parts of Toronto tend to flood when we get a lot of rain. Run in those areas and aim for the largest puddles you can find. Alternatively, run around a neighbour's pool, although you should probably ask permission first.

Tip 4: Think cool thoughts

No whining about the heat. Yes, it is hot. Your fellow runners know it is hot. You do not need to remind them. Instead, use visualization techniques to help keep cool. Imagine you are running effortlessly through the snow. Feel the flakes fall softly on your head. You're feeling cooler already, aren't you?

These unidentified cows are so effective at visualizing the gently falling snow that it appears that snow is actually falling. Amoozing, I mean, amazing!

Tip 5: Ice Cream and Popsicles

As a general rule, I find that ice cream and popsicles cool me down. This is true whether I eat the ice cream and popsicles or just hold them in my hands. Of course, it is probably a good idea to eat the ice cream and popsicles early in your run or you may end up with just the liquid remains of what used to be ice cream and popsicles. Alternatively, you could have ice cream and popsicles after your run, as a reward.

This baby just completed a 10K and is now celebrating with ice cream.

Tip 6: Take cool baths after your run to help bring your body temperature down

Consider taking a nice cool bath after you complete your run. Some runners even take ice baths! However, ice baths are meant to help reduce inflammation in your body. By happy coincidence, they will also lower your body temperature. Quickly.

My cat takes baths all the time to stay cool. He uses the bathroom sink. He prefers to lie in the cool ceramic sink without water. You should consider using your tub and filling it with cool water. If you put some ice in the water and if you have a toy boat, you can play Titanic.

Wiley, in the bath. He was a very clean cat.

FINALLY, remember to wear sunscreen, even on cloudy days. Have fun and stay safe!

Need motivation? There's an App for that!

Running is hard and sometimes we all need a little motivation en route. But what kind of motivation? And how can we access this motivation when we need it?

The geniuses at Go Girls Laboratories have developed motivation that you can carry with you and access with a single touch on your iPod, ADIDAS micoach, Nike running thingy, Blackberries, and similar electronic products. It's simple: we've created a Motivation App that allows you to pre-set a series of inspiring messages that can be readily accessed on whatever electronic device you carry with you.

Ah, you say, what a brilliant idea! But how does Go Girls Laboratories know what kind of motivation I need, you wonder. Well, here at Go Girls Laboratories, we've got you covered. We have developed a spectrum of different types of motivational messages delivered by diverse personna. You set the tone for your motivational messages by selecting an appropriate personna. Need some nurturing? Why, we've got an App for that! How about some tough love? Oh, there's an App for that, too! Read on to review some of our most popular personnApps, as we like to call our diverse line of motivational messages.

The Jewish Grandmother (quite possibly the best kind of grandmother there is)

Oi vey, you're working hard! Good for you! You're just like your grandfather with your determination. I always knew you were a champion. Never mind that Mendelson kid who beat you up in grade two. He's only a dentist now. But look at you: you're an endurance athlete! Keep it up and you'll have a husband/wife in no time! By the way, have you eaten?

Your Mother

You can do it, dear! Your father and I are very proud of you. But listen, if you need to stop, honey, you should just stop. It's okay. You're trying your best, but it's not worth dying over. I hope you put something on your feet to prevent blisters. You know how tender your feet are. Also, you should always wear clean underwear when you run just in case you are hit by a car and have to go to the hospital. I'm just saying! Be prepared! By the way, you're not going to wear that to the marathon are you?

Your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/partner

Baby, you are beautiful! Looking good, hon! Wow! You are soooo hot right now. You make me want to be a better person. You inspire me to greater things. So keep going, baby. Keep running! Remember: pain is weakness leaving the body! You can so do this! You own this run!

Your nice running friends

How are you doing? You okay? Need a break? We can take a break if you want. I can walk if you need to. Breathe deeply. You're all right. C'mon, you can do this! We're almost there!

Your other running friends

C'mon, keep up the pace. You're not going to break on me, are you? I'm not dragging your sorry ass all the way back, so get going. Don't hold us up. There are coffee and treats waiting for us at the end of this run, so let's go. Don't be a baby. Put it in gear and let's GO!

Your non-running friends

Dude, I couldn't run more than a block. I don't get why you run. Is it about being able to drink more beer? 'Cause I think you are crazy to be up so early to run. Dude, it's dark outside! You're crazy, man. CRAZY.

Peers from the 'hood

Yo, Paula Radcliffe. Yeah, that's right. I'm talking to you. What you doing? Running? WTF? The cops after you or something? You think you're better than us because you run? Well, you better start running now because if I catch you with your big runner's attitude around here, I'm going to beat you so bad you gonna wish you was dead.

Peers from my 'hood (Leaside)

Lovely day, isn't it? Why, have you been running? Good for you! I see that you're wearing a great pair of running shoes from last season. Oh yes, that version of the shoe has been updated. The owner of the running shoe company is friends with my dad, so he always sends me the newest version of the shoes. Of course, I don't run so much as I play tennis and golf. But good for you for getting out there and running! It must feel good to be out there with the masses, running away on a Saturday morning! Just lovely! Oh, I'm just going to move my stroller here...I don't want you to sweat on the baby...Okay, then, move along! Ta ta!

Grandpa Cranky Pants

You think you're working hard? Listen up kid, in my day, I had to run everywhere. EVERYWHERE. With no shoes. In the winter. I was lucky if I had socks. But I ran anyway. It prepared me for the war. You kids are too soft. You can't even handle playing Battleship. Cry, cry, cry...feelings, feelings, feelings. In my day, we had no time for feelings because we were out kicking Nazi ass and building the country up from scratch. So go finish your run and then fetch me the newspaper. Here's $5. You can keep the change.

Marine Drill Sargeant

Listen up, you pathetic excuse for an endurance athlete! This isn't supposed to be fun! It's supposed to be hard! It's supposed to be tough! You will hurt and you will learn to love the hurt! Why? Because you are a distance runner! Distance runners suffer! They don't complain! Distance runners dig deep and suck it up! That's right, worm: SUCK. IT. UP. You want easy? Talk a walk in the park with the other grandmas! That's where we send the pathetic, low-life, complaining babies who can't take a bit of PAIN in their run! Are you a BABY or are you a RUNNER?! You're a RUNNER? Well then, swallow your pain, lengthen your stride, sweat it on out, and bring it on home!

Each of the above personnAPPs is yours for one low price of $19.99! It's motivation in your pocket! Get through those final miles with gentle nurturing, adoration, passive aggressiveness, or just plain old tough love. Operators from the Go Girls Laboratories are standing by! Order yours today!

Not a Running Post

Ladies and Gentlemen, we interrupt our regularly scheduled posts about running to bring you this special message about product development.

Women are advancing on all sorts of new frontiers. Next year, we will celebrate the 25th anniversary of the introduction of the women's marathon event in the Olympics. There is no doubt today that women can excel at endurance sports. Moreover, women are advancing in the professional world. In Canada, we even have a female Chief Justice on the Supreme Court. Now that is progress considering that less than 100 years ago there was a very real legal debate about women were "persons".

Yet a glass ceiling still exists. Sometimes the ceiling is not even glass. Sometimes it is concrete and plaster.

If you have any doubt that women are not advancing in certain fields, I present to you the case of the Nicorette Inhalor. This Inhalor is meant to give people who are quitting smoking a proxy for a cigarette. The Inhalor is something you can put in your mouth just like a cigarette so that you can enjoy that feeling of having a cigarette dangling from your mouth without having to use an actual cigarette. Smart idea.

Alas, I suspect that there are NO women on the product development team of Nicorette. Neither are there women in key executive positions at Nicorette -- the sorts of positions that carry with them the authority to say, "Uh, no. We are not going to sell that product."

How do I know? I present to you Exhibit A, an advertisement for the Inhalor.




I present to you Exhibit B, another advertisement for the Inhalor.



Notice anything about those Inhalors, ladies?

That's right. We know that there cannot be women involved in product development at Nicorette because no woman would try to sell a fake cigarette that looks like a tampon.

Tough Cowboy? He was until he put a tampon in his mouth in lieu of a cigarette.

Romantic scene? Oh yes. Except for the fact that the lady and her gent are smoking tampons.

Hey Nicorette, for the sake of the dignity of smokers who are using your products to quit smoking, please hire a woman who is willing to say, "We are not taking cigarette tampons to market!"

Toronto Go Girls Hit the Runway

In mid-June, the glamourous Go Girls took to the runway to strut their stuff. While crowds of fans cheered and travelers stared, three members of the Go Girls ran down a runway. While running, they modeled the latest in running gear while the paparazzi snapped shots of the Glamour Girls, as Olga, Nana, and T came to be known.

That's right. We were on a runway and we were modeling something. I suppose I should qualify that the runway in question was not really a fashion runway. But it could have been. We're stylish, more or less, in a running sort of way.

Olga, Nana, and T participated in the 2010 Runway Run, a fun 5K run at Pearson International Airport. The race is actually run on a runway, although the airport does close down the runway so that planes do not land on top of the runners.

The runway next to the race runway, however, is open to air traffic. As we lined up at the starting line, we were treated to the sight of planes landing and taking off.

Coming in for a landing!

Touchdown!

Of course, the passengers in those airplanes were also treated to the sight of approximately 2500 people running around on the runway. I wonder what the passengers must have thought. If I was the captain of a plane taking off on that runway, I would say to those passengers: "Ladies and Gentlemen, on the right side of the plane you will see civilians running up and down the runway next to ours. These people are being punished for not listening to the captains of their airplanes. If you get out of your seat when the "Fasten Seatbelt" sign is on, I will personally make sure that you will join similar runners at our destination airport." And then I would laugh menacingly.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Toronto! On the runway next to us, you will see how the Toronto Airport handles your luggage. You will be released from the plane and asked to race toward a designated finish line. The first person across the finish line gets to choose whatever bags he or she wants!"

As much fun as watching the planes land and take off was, we did have a race to run. So we put on our game faces and prepared for the 5K ahead of us.

Step 1: Well, you know...

Step 2: Put on game faces for mandatory pre-race photo.

Step 3: Look at the plane parked on our runway! Cool!

Do you think they left the keys in it?

Step 4: RUN!

And run we did. We galloped up the runway, turned around and ran down to the other end of the runway before turning back again for the final 2K up the runway. Olga, Nana and T all posted respectable times. Olga and Nana both recorded times that were faster than they anticipated. T reports being disappointed by her time, but still relatively happy to have finished 10th in her age group (although it was not a particularly competitive field) and to have finished faster than last year.

The Glamour Girls, post race.

"Please don't check my "energy" drink!!"

Nana, T, a police officer, and a plane. This photo is pre-G20. If it were taken during the G20, we'd likely be cuffed.

To celebrate their success at the race, Olga, Nana, and T decided to head back into the city for some breakfast. (They considered going to some place near the airport but as it turns out, the area around the airport is a culinary blackhole. It was necessary to evacuate as soon as possible.)

Of course, in order to return to the city, the Glamour Girls had to find Olga's vehicle. This task proved more challenging than it should have. After some aimless wandering, the trio finally stumbled upon Olga's wheels and they were well on their way to a lovely brunch at the Rosedale Dinner.

Three cool cats in post-race glory.

The consensus following the Runway Run was that this race is awesome! We determined that we must do the Runway Run again.

After all, Glamour Girls belong on runways.

Go Girls Take on the Ride to Conquer Cancer

The Ride to Conquer Cancer is a weekend-long cycling event that occurs in various locations across Canada. The Ontario event takes place in June and features a 200K and a 200 mile bike ride over two days. The ride begins in Toronto and ends in Niagara Falls, with a stop in Ancaster overnight. Cyclists log 100K (or 100 miles) the first day, and then another 100K (or 100 miles) the second day. This year, the second year of the Ontario ride, 3,530 cyclists participated in the ride and, together with volunteers and crew members, raised $14.5 million for the Campbell Family Institute at the Princess Margaret Hospital, one of the top five cancer research centres in the world.

This year, two of the Go Girls participated in the Ride. Olga cycled the 200K and T crewed the event on the Gear Team. Both Olga and T found the event physically challenging but immensely rewarding.

Olga's task was fairly straightforward: cycle, cycle, cycle. That is not to say it was not tough. Olga had to ascend the Niagara Escarpment on her bike! Completing the epic 2-day, 200K cycle required a strong mind and a physically fit body. Olga, of course, brought both to the table.

T's task was slightly different. Her job was to load the gear of cyclists and crew members onto trucks, then drive one of the trucks to the camp site where the cyclists spent the night. She then helped the Gear Crew to unload all the luggage. When cyclists arrived into the camp, T helped the riders locate their luggage. T and other members of the gear crew were also asked to help pitch tents, so T learned how to pitch a tent. (It was actually quite easy.) After pitching tents for a while, T returned to help more cyclists locate luggage. When the heavens opened and the rain poured down, T and the other members of the Gear Crew did their best to cover all the luggage with tarps.

One of the 24' trucks driven by T for the Ride to Conquer Cancer.

Now, you may be wondering, how big were these trucks? They were big: 24', big-ass trucks. Let's take a moment to compare T with the truck.

This is T...

This is T and her truck:

Yes, her truck. By the end of the weekend, T was a bona fide truck driver, even if she did occasionally have difficulty climbing into the cab. Here is T making the ascent into her truck:

Step one: open the door and begin to hoist yourself up.

Step Two: Roll down the window and pause for a photo opp. Use the door the continue climbing up Everest, the nickname given to T's truck.

Step Three: Ah, victory! The sweet seat of success.

Of course, some adjustments still have to be made. It's hard to reach the pedals with the seat moved back.

But before you know it, T's in the driver's seat and ready to go. Look closely, she's there...

Is that really T behind the wheel? Yes, it seems that T (or T-Rex, as she is known on the roads) did manage to climb into this truck and drive around. And yes, we are all aware that this is a very frightening reality: T-Rex let loose in a big truck on the Queen E! Stand back! I don't know how big this thing gets!

Both Olga and T stayed in camp in Ancaster. Olga slept in one of the literally thousands of tents pitched for cyclist and crew members. T joined fellow Gear Crew members in the back of the trucks. The next morning, after a hearty breakfast prepared by the Kitchen Crew, both Olga and T went back to work. Olga set off on her bike for Niagara Falls, another 100K journey. T joined the other Gear Crew members in collecting and loading the gear of cyclists and crew members.

The three best Gear Crew members: T, Teressa & Kathryn.

Loading and unloading gear, by the way, is a lot of work. By the end of the weekend, T's hands were blistered from throwing, I mean, carrying luggage around. The gloves helped, but T's manicure was simply ruined.

After the cyclists had all left and the gear was all loaded, the Gear Crew paused for a photo.

The Gear Crew: don't they look like people who can handle manual labour?

While the cyclists made their way by bike to the Finish Line, the Gear Crew set out in their truck convoys to drive the luggage to the Finish Line. Of course, the Crew did make one stop: Tim Horton's. We needed coffee. Badly.

Once arriving in Niagara Falls, the Gear Crew unloaded all the luggage. Even wonder what approximately 5,000 pieces of luggage looks like?

This is more or less what 5,000 pieces of luggage looks like. It's a good thing we had a system to help cyclists locate their luggage!

By mid-afternoon, both Olga and T had completed their tasks. Olga had successfully logged 200K, up and down the Niagara Escarpment. (Unfortunately, we don't have any photos of Olga and her bike! But T can attest to the fact that Olga was there and looked stunning even after having cycled 100K.) T had loaded and unloaded luggage and driven a great big truck. There was a BBQ for cyclists and crew members, along with free beer.

By the end of the weekend, Olga had safely returned to Toronto (no, she did not have to bike all the way back to TO!) and T had safely returned her beloved truck, Everest, to the good people organizing this mammoth event.

The slogan of the Ride to Conquer Cancer is "Strength in Numbers". The Ride itself demonstrates strength in numbers: from the cyclists themselves to the volunteers to the various crews to the family and friends supporting the cyclists, there were many of us out, working together to support cancer research. This event works because we worked together. When you count both the crew members and the cyclists, there were over 4,000 people combining their efforts to raise money for cancer research -- $14.5 million of cooperation and hard work in the fight against cancer.

Hope and heartache. Almost everyone participating in the event, whether cycling or serving as crew, had a personal story related to cancer. There were cancer survivors and family members and friends of cancer survivors, but also family and friends of people who had lost their battle with cancer. This event showed that those who have been lost have certainly not been forgotten, but are carried in the hearts of family and friends.

Two in every five Canadians will be diagnosed with cancer at some point in their lifetime. This is a good time to remind our readers that early detection is key. Do regular cancer screening. Be informed. Know what your risks are.

And if you want to do more, consider participating in the Ride to Conquer Cancer in 2011. Both Olga and T will tell you that it is worth it. You might even get to drive a great big truck nicknamed Everest...

Go Girls Gone...to Newfoundland

This blog post is a bit late, but it is still worth posting.

The Go Girls are a global bunch. We run at home and we run while away (or at least we try to run while away). We collect our experiences of running on the road (get the pun?) so that those of us who are left behind (i.e., T) can live vicariously through these experiences. Our plan is to run the whole world. (Yes, another pun!)

Recently, one of our members, JaJa, took our "run the world" campaign to Newfoundland. While in St. John's, Newfoundland, JaJa took the opportunity to log a run and to document her accomplishment.

JaJa, in beautiful Newfoundland, having survived a tough run.

JaJa provides the following account of her running adventure in Newfoundland:

This [the above photo] was taken after a CHILLY run in very strong winds, drizzle and a few steep hills, probably the toughest 7k run I have ever made...
The inhospitable weather was related inversely to the friendly smiles and behaviour of the locals in this tiny hamlet of Witless Bay just outside the charming metropolis of St.John's Newfoundland.

From JaJa's accounts, we know that we will be made to feel very welcome in Newfoundland, but we'll be in for some tough runs. That's okay: we're pretty tough ourselves.

In other "Go Girls Gone" news, Nana has assured us that she stayed active while on the Appalachian Trail. However, due to the narrow roads and twists and turns, Nana wisely elected to hike rather than run while on the Trail. Mariana has reported running in Chile, Brazil, and Italy. Some say she has even been spotted running in Toronto recently.

The rest of the Go Girls are out and about. Wherever you are in the world, keep your eyes open. You just might see one of us go by on our campaign to Run the World.

Sorry that this blog has not been updated in a while. We have lots of things to report...but right now, we're a bit preoccupied with the World Cup! Here is a video to amuse you until we are back with more posts about the Go Girls.